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Monday, September 30, 2013

Why You Shouldn't Trust Men 100%



As you know, my job requires me to go out and meet people, which I love. Almost all of them (except the very few who are the quiet/prepetually-busy types) become like close friends to me. Whenever we meet up, we only talk business for 10 minutes max. The rest are conversations about all sorts of random things. You know, things that you talk about with friends. 

(sometimes I think it's so funny how I am 'friends' with guys who are in their 40s and even 50s)

My boss accompanied me to a business meeting once. From her observation, she told me that my strength is building rapport with people. She was impressed that by the end of the first meeting, the client (who was initially very quiet and reserved), in the end became very talkative and he and I were already making jokes at each other's expenses. 

I admit that this makes my job easy. When clients are comfortable talking to you, and they trust you, it's easier to seal the deal. But sometimes, my clients trust me too much and they are so comfortable talking to me that they would tell me things that I really don't want to know about.

Like their extra marital affairs.

Sigh.

I am sad to say that more than 50% of my clients have cheated on their partners. 

Let's face it girls. We really can't trust men.

Now before you say things like "But my husband is so sweet to me/my husband goes to the mosque 5 times a day/I am drop dead gorgeous so I am sure it won't happen to me", well, you better read on.



Example #1

Mr A is a colleagues of someone I know. Before meeting him, I asked my acquantance how is he like and what are his hobbies so that I would know what to talk about with him when I see him. The person said that he is very nice guy and is well-respected among his peers. When I came to his office, I saw his family picture on his desk. They look like a nice family. His wife wears a hijab and a niqab. The client was also very pleasant and respectful towards me. 

On our 3rd meeting, he told me about his mistress in Jakarta -____-

They met at the golf course a few years back, where she was his caddy driver. Ever since then he has been transferring money to her every month without fail. He even showed me their text messages, and videos of her singing to him wtf.



Example #2

Mr B is a good looking guy, and is quite charming. So I was not surprised when he told me about his torrid affairs with multiple women. What surprised me was the fact that his wife is crazy hot. Like, seriously hot. Like, dude, come on. Other guys would kill to have a wife who looks like that after 3 kids and here you are bangin on chicks who probably don't even look half as good as her. 

He told me that he truly loves his wife and children. He's only sleeping with other women for fun. He prefers someone who is already married or in a relationship because he wants to make sure that she only wants sex, like him. He doesn't want any commitments or strings attached.

He said one time he started to develop feelings for a woman that he was sleeping with. When he realised it, he instantly broke things off with her because he feared that things would get complicated. To him, his affection, his quality time, his money are for his wife and family. Being in a serious relationship with another woman or having another wife is just gonna cost him, which is why he only wants one night stands.

He also said, "What she doesn't know won't hurt her".

I asked him, "What if your wife is doing the same thing behind your back?"

He paused to think about it and then said, "Just don't let me find out. My affairs are not affecting my relationship with my wife. I treat her well and I take care of my family. So if she's also doing the same thing and I don't know about it and she stays the same, then I'm okay. Because we're happy."

:O



Example #3

Mr C kept telling me that he is the luckiest guy because he has the perfect wife. She cooks for him everyday without fail, she never once raised her voice to him for the 30 years that they have been married, she looks after herself, she's an amazing mom to their children, she's patient and understanding etc. 

And every time he talks about his wife, he just glows. He showed me their holiday pictures where they look so lovey dovey with their hands around each other and looking into each others eyes. I thought, wow, a guy who gushes about his wife like this.. It really is the sweetest thing. His wife is so lucky! 

Well, not so lucky. Because it turns out Mr C has a long-time girlfriend.



These three examples are only the tip of these iceberg. I wonder why I haven't lost faith in men altogether -____-

And after all these while, it is still hard for me to keep a straight face when they tell me these things. I mean, yeah they're like friends to me but at the end of the day they're my clients and I have to respect them. Plus, it's really non of my business and it's not my place to say anything. But still, sometimes I just feel like punching them in the face. 

Some guys cheat because their wives don't care about them or their wives refuse to be intimate with them. Some do it because they have lost feelings towards their wives after years of marriage. Some do it because their friends do it. Some do it simply because they can and they want to. 

So the moral of the story is, never trust men 100%. Always make a point to know where they are and who they're with. Maybe these would help too:

  • Check their phones

I check Nadri's phone once in a while, and he could check mine anytime he wants. 

(It's funny how my group chat with my girls is filled with actual conversations while his group chat is full of pictures of boobs and cleavage and short texts like "Makan?" "Mana?" "Rasta" "Jom")


It's not like I do it every day anyway. I just like knowing that I could and he's perfectly ok with it. I know some people hate it when their other half do that but I don't get it. If you have nothing to hide, why is it an issue? Unless you're the kind who is super jealous and gets all batshit crazy even if you see an innocent text message from his lady colleague asking him for documents, maybe that's why your husband doesn't want you snooping around?

Mr C from example 3 said that one of the reasons his wife is perfect is because she gives him total privacy. He told me that he could even answer his girlfriend's calls when he's at home because he'd just tell his wife that he has an important call to take and go to the other room and his wife wouldn't even question who it was or even bother to check it herself. 

I don't blame Mr C for 'loving' his wife so much. Not only is she the perfect wife, but her naivety also allows him to get away with infidelity.

  • Keep track of their finances

Mr A from Example 1 transfers money to his mistress every month. If only his wife checks his account transactions, she'd figure things out. 

I have access to Nadri's bank account, credit card statement (full of items from Toys R us and Mothercare and Zara Baby, so unfair!), and Paypal. I also have the password to all of his email accounts and social networks, and he knows mine as well. Maybe that's because our password is usually the same, just like our ATM pin number. And sometimes he has to ask me for his credit card number because I have memorised it along with the 3 digit security code LOL.

  • Be financially secure

So that if your husband turns out to be a lying cheating scumbag (nauzubillah), you can ditch him and survive on your own. If you're a housewife, make sure you have ample savings and put the house and any other assets under your name or something.




Some girls might say, why so paranoid? Don't be so insecure with yourself. To me it's not about being insecure. It's about not letting anyone make a fool out of myself, like what my clients are doing to their wives.

I have met Mr B's wife twice. Like I said, she's crazy hot. She's friendly, she has the most beautiful smile, she dresses well, she walks holding hands with her husband. They really look like the perfect couple.

And yet she has no idea that her husband regularly sleeps with other women ever since they got married. I can't help but feel sorry for her.

I'm sure none of us want anybody to feel that way about us.

So everyone, remember:




TRUST, BUT VERIFY






P/S: This goes both ways. I am not saying only guys cheat. Women do it too.



He sent me this just now -____-

You've been clean so far mister, but don't think you're off the hook! I got my eyes on you lol.




After reading the comments, I have decided to address some of the issues HERE.

Thursday, September 19, 2013

Lunch Date











Nadri's Unagi (yucks) and Ebi tempura set.




He was willing to share the pickles only. Pfft. 




My Salmon teriyaki set. 






Kogetsu @ Saujana Golf Club












Top: Random
Necklace: H&M
Pants: Fashion Valet
Shoes: FRH 
Bag: Chanel
Date: Nadri, husband/personal photographer hahaha

Saturday, September 14, 2013

Halal

After seeing the comments on this post, I thought that I'd say something regarding the issue.

Yes you are right, Sage Restaurant does not have the Halal certification by JAKIM. Same as many many other restaurants that we see in shopping malls (Chilis, TGIF, Italiannies, Tony Romas, just to name a few). Usually the reason is because they serve alcohol/use alcohol as their ingredients.

I have to confess that I frequent these restaurants anyway because they don't serve pork, they can leave out alcohol when preparing your food and I have confirmed with the staffs that the meat source itself is halal.

For instance, a Sage hostess named Anis (or Aida?) assured me that their meat is halal. I am sure Anis knows what halal means so I decided to take her word for it. BUT, if you are skeptical (was-was) then you should avoid going to those places altogether. 

Like when I heard a rumour about Fatty Crab using Ketam Batu (haram for Muslims), I went and asked their staff and the lady said yes they do. But another friend of mine asked another staff on another day and she was told differently. So since there's uncertainly there (was-was), I stopped going to Fatty Crab. I miss their chili crab though :(

I know my way is not perfect. But I am doing my best. If it's something that is blatantly haram like pork and alcohol, then I will avoid. Even when I lived in Melbourne for 2 years, I never once consumed non-halal meat. Every week Nadri would take the train to go to the halal butcher in the suburbs. When we dine out at restaurants we would order seafood. Same goes when we travel overseas. Seafood or halal Lebanese food only. Not forgetting Maggi and Brahims too of course ;)

When we were in London last December, the driver took us to this Fish & Chips restaurant which is apparently the best in town. The shop owner figured that we were Muslims and was kind enough to let us know that she cooks their fish fillets and pork sausages using the same oil. If she didn't tell us, I would have dined there but since she did, I passed even though we came all the way just for it. 

I do have friends who are more 'lenient' when they are overseas. I do not judge them and I certainly do not think that I am better than them for being more careful. 

I believe that everyone has their own principles and that they should be respected. 


My Third Biggest Fear

My biggest fears are:

1) Losing loved ones
2) Cockroaches
3) Flying

I am sure everyone can relate to #1. 

If you can't relate to #2, then there is something seriously wrong with you. Cockroaches are terrifying. And for some reason they always run towards you, not away from you. Ugh just typing that C word is making me feel prickly all over.

But today, I wanna talk about #3. My fear of flying.

I don't really have a problem with take off or landing. I am a nervous wreck when there's turbulence. Trust me, you do not want to sit next to me on the plane. Nadri has permanent scars on his arms from me digging my nails into his flesh whenever there is even the slightest turbulence.

My pilot clients have told me that turbulence is normal. It's just like when we're driving and we hit a pothole or the road is not smooth, so the car bumps a little. No biggie. Yeah well, at least when we're driving we're touching the ground. It's so not the same as flying because we're hanging (HANGING!!!!) in the sky.
 
I still remember my worst flight, which was with Saudi Air, on my way back from Umrah. It was so crazy rocky I literally cried. I recited the Quran and the selawat (prayers for our Prophet p.b.u.h) the whole way. When we landed I almost kissed the ground. I refused to fly after that. Took me one and a half years to get on another plane.

I guess the fact that I am a control freak and that I am scared of heights are the reasons why I am like this. The anxiety attack that I would get is so bad that whenever I go on long haul flights, I would take cough or flu medicine just so that I would sleep through.

Three days ago, we took a flight to Nadri's dad's hometown, Kelantan. And yesterday, we landed back here. Usually when we go back there during Raya we would drive because the journey from Kota Bharu airport to Jeli takes a few hours anyway (longer during the festive seasons), but since we were rushing this time and we figured the traffic to Jeli would be smooth, we flew in and rented a car.

I haven't flown domestic in the longest time. I forgot how small the planes are so these short trips.

(Smaller planes  =  More turbulence  =  Me peeing in my pants)

As if the flight to Kelantan (with MAS) was not terrifying enough, our flight back was with Firefly. Imagine my horror when I saw that the plane has propellers instead of the usual jet engines.




For some reason, I feel more secure when it's the jet engine.




My anxiety level was obviously higher due to the propeller issue. Because of this, the 1 hour flight felt like forever. And the fact that Alayna and Nadri dozed off to sleep before the plane took off didn't help either.

It was just me, the plane and my overworked mind.

Every single sound, every single bump made my heart stop. I would then steal glances at the cabin crews to see if they look worried, which would indicate that the sound that I heard or the bump that I felt was something out of the ordinary. But no, the crews always look so poised and calm. And somehow, that doesn't give me assurance at all.

Then things got pretty rocky as we were going through the thick clouds. The plane took a few dips which caused a pit in my stomach. I started praying and reciting some Surahs. When that was over and we were cruising smoothly, I noticed that the seat belt light was still on. And that just bugged the hell out of me. A million things went trough my mind.

Why wouldn't the pilot switch of the light? 

Is there something wrong that the pilot is not telling us? 

Why hasn't he made the routine announcement to tell us about the progress of the flight, what the weather is like and how he wants us to sit back, relax and enjoy the flight? 

Oh god something IS wrong.

I kept staring at the seat belt sign, going crazier by the minute.  After what seemed like forever, the light was finally turned off. And the routine announcement was made by the co-pilot.

I calmed down a little after that, but not for long. As we were slowly descending, an old man wearing the pilot hat and a white shirt with a vest started to make way down the aisle to the back of the plane. He was going to the toilet.

Are you kidding me? The captain (he's old so he has to be the captain) decides to choose this crucial time to go pee?? He's leaving us at the mercy of his co-pilot (who by the way sounded SIXTEEN when he made the announcement earlier)???

My mind went wild again. I kept turning around to see if the captain was done. What was taking him so long anyway? Now is not the time to get diarrhoea.

(OK but now that I think of it, I don't think that the guy was the captain at all. In fact, I am now pretty sure that he wasn't even wearing the pilot hat. He was wearing a baseball hat. And besides, it's kinda silly to think that the pilots have to go all the way to the back of the plane to use the toilet. I'm sure they have their own private one or something. But you know how it is. When you're paranoid sometimes you start seeing things)

After the 'captain' has gone back to the front, there was an announcement saying that we were going to land shortly and that all electronic devices have to be switched off.

I felt the plane descending and I gripped Nadri's arm even harder (he's still sleeping) and braced myself for possible turbulences.

And then I swear to God I heard an incoming text message beep.

I was livid. Either the stupid idiot switched on his goddamn phone or he never even bothered to switch it off in the first place. I tried to wake Nadri up because I was so scared. But he barely opened his eyes and mumbled "I need to go to the carwash to get my hair cut."

I was too petrified to laugh. So I just closed my eyes and said my prayers.

Alhamdulillah, God decided to spare me from more torture and willed for the landing to be super smooth. I practically ran out once we were allowed to leave the aircraft. 


Sorry Alayna, Mommy needs a few minutes to calm down.


Looks like the Bali trip that we've been planning is not going to happen. I don't think I can get on a plane anytime soon.


Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Rongak


If your toddler suddenly gets all quiet..


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It usually means trouble.

Le sigh.

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

Magic Brush

Girls!!! I have found the perfect tool for us to get the professional salon blow curl effect at home! And I am so excited to share it with all of you =D

Last Friday I went to Hairkunst for a haircut. Normally I would run in the other direction whenever someone even says the word haircut but Bambang (the owner) is really great. He makes me feel comfortable and he didn't laugh at me when I almost cried the first time I came to his hair salon a few months back to cut my hair. Some hairstylist in the past have said things like "Why are you so attached to your hair? It's just hair mahh, it will grow back wannn." I just wanna slap them you know?

Bambang on the other hand is very understanding. The first time I met him, he said "I know, you feel like you hair is your identity kan? You hair is a part of you." And I was like, finally someone gets it! Then he really took his time to explain to me exactly what he was going to do to my hair, while assuring me that my hair will still look long, just more healthy and full, which was what I wanted. 

So obviously when I needed another major haircut last week, I went to him. This time I wanted to go a bit shorter. 




Ok la it's not that short but this is short enough for me. 

While they were blowdrying my hair, I asked Bambang how do I get this kind of effect at home? I don't have the skills and the patience to blow curl my hair, and when I use thong/straightener I get nice curls but nothing like this. He then introduced me to something that I will never be without:




It's like a normal round brush, but heated in the middle. 

They demonstrated how to use it and made me try on my own hair. I was not used to it so I kinda fumbled. I bought it anyway because it was just RM249, which I think is pretty reasonable. 

Yesterday I decided to try it and this is the result:




A-MAZE-BALSSSSSSS!!!!

This is exactly what I wanted all along! Big, loose curls, with LOTS of volume. I am never using curling thong or hair straightener to curl my hair anymore.

Since it was my first time using it, it took me a while to figure out how to get this result. And the best part is, you can also use this brush to get the blow in/blow out effect. 

I am one happy girl! Definitely money well spent.

You guys can get it from Hairkunst. I forgot what it's called. My maid threw the box away. I guess you can just show them the picture of the brush. 

A  few people commented on my Instagram asking Bambang if the brush could be posted to them. He said he will check with his staffs. If it's possible, then that's great for those of you who are unable to go and get it from the salon. 




Bambang Soteto. The only person I trust to even come close to my hair with a pair of scissors lol.




My girl Farah Munirah, who dropped by to accompany me at the salon.




Yana came too! The only person missing is Erin :(


P.S: This is especially for you Tasha! I know you've been waiting for the hair tutorial. This brush gives a much better result compared to my other methods before this :)

Sunday, September 8, 2013

The Fashion Valet Shoot

So 3 weeks ago, I was contacted by Fashion Valet. They were wondering if I was interested to be one of their models for their Independence Day themed photo shoot. 

I thought they got the wrong person.

At first I wanted to say no because I have absolutely zero experience with modelling, and it is something that is wayyy out of my comfort zone. But then I figured, what the heck. It's a once in a lifetime thing. So I said yes.

Then I received a text saying, "Oh by the way your co-stars are Carey Ng (winner of Miss Universe Malaysia 2013) and another girl from the Miss Universe Malaysia Organisation.

Are. You. Freaking. Kidding. Me.

Oh god what did I get myself into?? T__T

A few days before the shoot, I was informed that:

  • the call time is 6 am @ FV office
  • the shoot will end around 6-7pm
  • I was told to wear nude underwear and a strapless bra

The night before the shoot, I set the alarm at 4.30 am.

I woke up at 5.50am.

I texted Marissa to tell her that I was going to be a bit late. I took a super quick shower, kissed Alayna goodbye (I almost cried because I've never left home before she woke up) and zoomed off to the FV office.

When I reached, the other two models (Carey Ng couldn't make it, so they replaced her with Miss Malaysia World 2013 1st runner up. Seriously why the hell was I there? T____T) already had their hair and makeup done. 

After that everything happened so fast. Hair and make up - a quick fitting of my outfits that I was going to wear for the shoot - off to Dataran Merdeka.

The two girls and I got a ride with the make up artist, Joey. When we reached the Dataran she dropped us off first because finding a parking space was going to take a while.

As we were standing there waiting for everyone to arrive, we saw a group of girls nearby who were also dolled up and wearing kinda fancy clothes. They kept looking over to us and we were like, "Umm are they here for the FV photoshoot too? Should we go wait with them?"

A guy walked towards that group and started ushering the girls into a van. He called us up and signalled for us to hurry up and get into the van as well.

We were so confused.

Turns out they were shooting for an Indian movie dance scene hahahaha. I don't blame them for thinking that we were there for the same thing too. I mean, normally people don't go to Dataran Merdeka so damn early in the morning, all made up and wearing 5 inch heels just for fun right?

After what seemed like forever, the whole crew finally arrived. The MUA, the hairstylist, Dean (Vivy's husband/FV's CEO) the FV girls (Marissa, Kim, Jasmine) and the photographer, Nick, who is one of CLEO's most eligible bachelors.

And then.. the madness began.

(The following behind the scene pictures are courtesy of Kim & Jasmine. I was having a major panic attack the whole time I didn't even bother whipping out my phone to take selfie pics or ask someone to take photos for me)




Test shots by Kim. 



For the second outfit, we had to cross the road while talking to and laughing with each other. It took the longest time because the traffic light takes forever to turn green. And when it does, it lasts for literally less than 10 seconds. Since we had to do a few rounds to get a good shot, a lot of time was spent waiting for the traffic light by the roadside.



While waiting..



Right: L'oreal Mok. Miss Malaysia World 2013 1st runner up

Middle: Stephanie Vincent. Miss Universe Malaysia 2012 finalist 

Left: Tia Hakim. Miss Nobody

These girls are crazy tall too. Stephanie is 5'10". She's as tall as Adriana Lima! She told me that she's the shortest in her family :O




Pitstop to take a photo before we walked to the next spot. Yes, walk. In heels. Under the scorching hot son. While having strangers stare and point at you.


Then we moved on to the last location, the old KTM train station.


With Jasmine, FV's stylist, who eats like nobody's business and yet remains a size zero.


Third outfit. 

See? Not as glamorous as you'd think. Getting hair and make up done on a bench next to the dustbin lol. 



I loveee these Noona pants. Gorgeous print and they're super comfy to boot. It's nice to wear loose pants for a change. I ended up buying it in turquoise. 


We wrapped the shoot around 4.30pm. Then all of us went to Pavilion to eat (my first meal of the day). But I was too tired to even finish my food (which is so not normal for me, I usually finish mine and Nadri's). Man, no wonder models are skinny.

I reached home at 7pm. I was so engorged my girls were as hard as stone. I wonder if that's what having breast implants feels like..

Selfie on the way home. Make up by Joey.

Anywayyy, these are the official photos taken from FV's website:





What I have learned from this experience:

Modelling is NOT easy. 

The hardest part is to not look like you're posing O_o There is also a lot of waiting and standing involved (throughout the 6 hours+ shoot, I think I sat down for less than 2 hours). If your shoot is outdoors and the weather is hot, then it's worse. Sometimes there's physical pain too. For example if your shoes are too big or too small, you just have to suck it. Like when we were crossing the road, Stephanie tripped and fell a few times because her shoes kept coming off. She had to quickly put them back on and continue to walk with a smile on her face as if nothing is wrong (see above picture). Seriously, I have a new found respect for models now.

I definitely can't be a one. It's so different posing for a professional photographer as compared to posing for friends/family/Nadri because with them I can just try anything and make a fool of myself and not care XD

I'll stick to being a financial consultant and a part time blogger, thanks hehe.